Hellbent
Chapter 11
Face The Music
Craig stood outside a large bedroom window of the Wood’s mansion, holding a boombox above his head, blasting ‘Nobody’s Fault’ by Testament. He replayed the chorus line of “Sorrryyyyyy! Sorrrryyyyyyyyyyyy!” on repeat.
The window slid open and ‘Lord Kradula Ov Khaos’ stuck his head out of the window in full corpse-paint makeup.
Lord Kradula: “What are you doing, you bogan idiot?”
He hissed at him.
Craig: “Fuck off, Dorkula, I’m here for Veronika!”
He huffed. Lord Kradula scoffed at him.
Lord Kradula: “Wrong window, idiot.”
He rolled his eyes at him. Craig lowered the boombox.
Craig: “Fuck. Which window is it?”
Lord Kradula: “You seriously don’t know?!”
He laughed at him.
He turned his attention to another window opening around the corner of the house.
Veronika: “What the fuck do you want, Craig?”
She hissed and glared down at him.
Craig: “I fucked up, V!”
He cried.
Veronika: “No shit. You’re pathetic, Craig. Wait until your father hears about this!”
She shook her head at him. Craig’s heart sank.
Craig: “NO! Don’t go to him!”
He pleaded with her, groveling to his knees. Veronika scoffed and shook her head at him.
Veronika: “For god sake stand on your feet when you’re talking to me! I need a REAL man like Blake, not a pathetic weakling like you.”
She scoffed. Craig’s face twisted and contorted.
Craig: “Blake?! Pfft, the same asshole tryin’ to woo Andreas with a fuckin’ spice rack?!”
He laughed bitterly, trying to mask his broken tears.
Veronika: “Andreas?”
She frowned.
Veronika: “You can’t read a room for shit, Craig. He’s not pining after Andreas, but YOU are.”
She spat, pointing at him. Craig bowed his head.
Veronika: “You’re chasing after a man who hates you! Andreas is DONE with you, Craig! Read the fucking room! What about ME?”
She snapped at him.
Craig: “Sorry, V… I’m here now, ain’t I?”
He pleaded.
Veronika: “You’re going to have to do better than that, Craig!”
She scoffed, folding her arms across her chest, and looking down at him.
Veronika: “And it better be better than a three-hundred-dollar cake!”
She added, barring her teeth at him.
Craig: “...What do you want, V?!”
He pleaded with her. Veronika narrowed her gaze on him. She then folded her arms across her chest and stroked her chin.
Veronika: “You really want to make this up to me Craig?”
She challenged him. Craig swallowed hard.
Craig: “Fuckin’ oath! I’ll do anything!”
He pleaded.
Veronika: “You are to forget about Andreas and you are to do whatever I ask of you now because Nuklear Intoxikation will be led by ME now!”
She commanded, gesturing to herself. Craig’s heart sank.
Craig: “...B-But, Nuklear is MY baby!”
He pleaded.
Veronika: “And that baby will grow into a man under my reign, and so will you!”
She said firmly. Craig felt as though the ground had fallen out from beneath him. He went to speak when she held her hand up, cutting him off.
Veronika: “Look, you can either lose me and continue to pine after a man who hates you until you have nothing left or… you can become bigger than you are now, making history in the first female-fronted Thrash metal band, playing on the bill for the ThrashThrillerFest world tour.”
She challenged him. Craig’s eyes widened.
Craig: “...Y-You could get us into ThrashThrillerFest?”
He swallowed hard.
Veronika: “Hmm, I think I could get Daddy to pull some strings, but ONLY if you agree to these terms.”
She stroked her chin and smirked at him. Craig: “Alright! It's a deal!”
He blurted without another thought. Veronika grinned widely at him.
Veronika: “Good boy. You’d be stupid not to. You get to be with me and get to live your dream. Win-Win. You’re lucky I’m so forgiving and generous.”
She smiled widely at him.
Veronika: “But, if you EVER dare cross me, Craig, I’ll give you hell to pay and worse than Larry!”
She narrowed her eyes into slits and warned him, slamming her window shut. Craig swallowed hard and nodded.
Craig: “...Fuck.”
~
Blake and Andreas strolled through Heathervale Lake Park together, enjoying the warm summer breeze.
Blake: “I work in this park.”
Andreas: “Really?
Blake nodded.
Blake: “Yeah, I’m a landscaper.”
He stated, admiring the clean-cut grass and hedges.
Andreas: “Oh, so you're a gardener?”
He smiled. Blake nodded in confirmation.
Blake: “Somewhat. I may as well put the skills I was raised with to good use. It pays the bills.”
He stated. At least I got something useful out of Sunshire, he thought.
Andreas: “Likewise. Måneravn isn't enough to pay the bills on its own, so I work part-time in the garden section at Hardware Warehouse.”
He explained. Blake was pleased to hear they shared something else in common.
Blake: “Interesting.”
No wonder Craig was bumming around there, he thought to himself.
Andreas: “Well, seeing as you work in the park, you should come down to the markets sometime. I run my Måneravn stall there.”
He stated, gesturing to the lakeside with the sign for ‘Sunday Markets’.
Blake: “Oh really?”
He enquired.
Andreas: “Maybe Ashley could run a stall, too?”
He suggested. Blake smiled a bit.
Blake: “Huh… you know what? That’s not a bad idea.”
He nodded.
Blake: “Anything to get him away from that clown.”
He frowned, thinking of Maxx.
Andreas: “Oh, Maxx?”
He thought back to seeing him with the other clowns at the carnival.
Blake: “Do you know him?”
He pressed.
Andreas: “Not really? He moved into that house after I left. He wasn’t there for long though. I only met him once when I went over there to pick up my stuff and he came to the door in a G-string.”
He groused and laughed. Blake twisted his mouth.
Blake: “Tell me about it. I have to live with that.”
He shook his head.
Andreas: “Why do you have to live with that?”
He asked. Blake drew a long breath.
Blake: “Because Ashley makes bad choices and I want him to see the light that I was right and that he should listen to me!”
He huffed.
Andreas: “You can’t make them see the light… you can only guide them towards it. Sometimes we need to journey through the darkness to find the light.”
He stated.
Blake: “But, it's clear as day! How could he not see it?! Even after I point it out to him?! Why doesn't he just listen to me?!”
He threw his arms up with frustration.
Andreas: “Well, Ashley has been sheltered their whole life, so they don't have the life experience to have that fortitude and wisdom yet to make more informed choices. They can take in the information from your advice, but you can't enforce it. It's outside of you. They have to learn this themselves.”
He explained. Blake sighed.
Blake: “I know… that's why I’m worried about him being alone with that clown… I don’t trust him as far as I can throw him! Trust me, I want to!”
He paced around anxiously.
Andreas: “Who? Maxx or Ashley?”
He challenged.
Blake: “Maxx of course! Ashley is the only person I trust! Hell, sometimes his honesty gets him into trouble!”
He declared. Andreas pondered.
Andreas: “Then why don't you trust Ashley to make their own choices without you?”
He challenged him. Blake turned to him, looking nervous at the thought.
Blake: “It's not Ashley, it's other people I don't trust!”
He shook his head. Andreas sighed.
Andreas: “We need experience to make more confident and informed decisions. Ashley needs to live their own experiences and own life and sometimes that will mean making a choice you wouldn't make and don't understand or a choice that will hurt them. You can feel your feelings on the matter and you can advise them, but you can’t tell them what to do. Their choices are outside of your control. You're not their parent and they're not a child.”
He said firmly.
Andreas: “Surely, you have also made decisions they don't like or agree with either. You don't have to like or agree with their decisions, but you need to accept that this is outside of you and your control.”
He added for good measure.
Blake inhaled deeply and then exhaled as he tried to digest this bitter pill to swallow.
Blake: “I guess you're right…”
Andreas: “You said you don't trust other people. What about me?”
He challenged. Blake glanced at him.
Blake: “...I think trust is something that is earned, not given.”
Andreas nodded in agreement with that notion.
Andreas: “Well, it seems I have earned your trust enough for you to open up to me like this.”
He stated. Blake paused when he realised.
Blake: “Huh… perhaps you have…”
He smiled a bit.
Blake: “I apologise for dumping this on you.”
He bowed his head. Andreas held his hand up.
Andreas: “This is not dumping on me. No, that would be dumping a big cake on my lawn and leaving me with a mess to clean up.”
He assured him and laughed bitterly. Blake groaned when he thought of Craig.
Andreas: “You and Ashley are not as different as you think you are…”
He noted, recalling Ashley apologising to him for the same thing before. Blake gaped at him disbelievingly.
Andreas: “You don't need to apologise for being vulnerable and open with your feelings.”
He assured him. Blake shifted uncomfortably at the thought of being vulnerable. He always thought of Ashley as being vulnerable, but never himself. Was he? He pondered and felt ashamed.
Andreas observed his body language and demeanor and reached out to him, placing his hand on his shoulder. Blake froze and shivered to his touch, taken by surprise.
Andreas: “You have nothing to be ashamed of. I'm glad you feel like you can be vulnerable with me.”
Andreas: “Craig never could and that is what made him weak and led to our downfall. Don't be fooled by his macho-man act. Underneath it all, he's a craven liar. I don't want to be with a cowardly illusion. I want something real.”
He stated, locking his gaze on Blake. Blake smiled a bit.
Blake: “Well, you will only get honesty from me. I tell it how it is.”
He assured him.
Andreas: “Good. That makes me glad. I want to get to know you more and want you to be real and honest with me as I will be with you.”
He smiled at him.
Blake: “I would like that…”
He said softly and smiled back at him.
~
Later, Blake returned home. He turned the key and opened the door and was met with an unpleasant and cold sensation circling his feet.
Blake: “WHAT THE FUCK?!”
He rasped, taken aback to see the entire house was flooded with water. Ashley came rushing out of his bedroom, juggling his cats and a mop in his arms.
Ashley: “BLAKE! Thank the stars you’re here! I-I don’t know what happened! All of a sudden, the house started filling with water, but it wasn’t raining, so I don’t understand?! Is the Sun goddess cursing us for leaving Sunshire?!”
He cried and hyperventilated. Blake placed his hand on his shoulder.
Blake: “Calm down, Ashley. Be rational, the pipes are leaking somewhere. Let me handle this. I’ll get to the bottom of what caused this and fix this.”
He assured him. Ashley swallowed hard and nodded, wiping his tears.
Maxx came stumbling down the hallway crying with his merch box in his arms.
Maxx: "NOOOOO! MY ROCKIN' MERCH!"
He cried as his glamor shots, cassette tapes, and T-shirts were sprinkled with water. Blake turned to him, locking an icy glare on him.
Blake: "YOU! WHAT THE FUCK DID YOU DO?!
He rasped at Maxx, grabbing him by the neck.
Maxx: "Owwwh! What did I do?!"
He choked and squirmed in his grip.
Ashley: "Blake! You're hurting him!"
He cried. Blake let go of Maxx and slammed his merch box into the pool of water. The prints on his T-shirts washed off into a psychedelic spiral of water.
Maxx: “NOOOOOOOOOOOO!”
Suddenly, they were startled by an eruption of water coming from the bathroom. Blake and Ashley hastily rushed to the bathroom.
Blake marched over to the toilet, grabbed the plunger, and yanked out a spare rib. Ashley's face went ashen as he shifted his eyes over to Maxx.
Ashley: “...I-is that tonight’s dinner?!”
He cupped his mouth.
He seethed, shoving Maxx into the pool of water, as his shirt print washed off.
Maxx: “Owwwh! MY SEXY SHIRT!”
Ashley: "...Y-You hate my food that much that you'd flush it down the toilet and flood the house instead of telling me?!"
He cried and embraced himself.
Maxx: "It's nothing personal, A-rad! I just wanted chickie nuggies and wanted to spare your feelings, gosh! Get it, spare ribs?"
Blake: "SO, YOU FLUSHED HIS FOOD DOWN THE TOILET?!"
He roared in Maxx’s face, throwing the spare rib at his face.
Maxx: “OWWWH!”
He whined.
Ashley: "DUDE, you hurt MORE than just my feelings! Y-YOU DAMAGED OUR HOUSE!"
He snapped through his tears and huddled into himself. Blake glared at Maxx with pure hatred.
Blake: “THAT’S IT! YOU’RE OUT OF HERE!!”
He rasped, grabbing Maxx by the collar and dragging him over to the door. Ashley sighed and bowed his head, huddling himself.
Maxx: “NOOOO! A-RAAAD! DO SOMETHING!”
He whined and pleaded with him, grabbing onto his collar. Ashley pursed his lips.
Ashley: “I-I’m sorry, dude… I-I can’t anymore…”
He sobbed, looking at all the damage around them. Blake smiled at Ashley proudly. Maybe Andreas was right? He pondered. Maxx gaped at Ashley.
Maxx: “Pfft! I thought you had a heart, A-Rad! Or is that just an act to look good?! How could you put me out when I’ve got nowhere to go? I don’t know where my bandmates are! They’re MISSING! I thought YOU of all people would understand THAT!”
He wailed. Ashley froze and his heart sank when he glanced up at the photo of his parents hanging on the wall.
Ashley: “...Th-They’re missing?!”
He swallowed hard.
Maxx: “YES, A-RAD! I don’t know where they are!”
He sobbed and wailed into the wall. Ashley cupped his mouth. Blake gaped at Maxx skeptically.
Blake: “In your shit? Because you’re full of shit?!”
He narrowed his icy-cold gaze at him.
Ashley: “BLAKE!”
He cried, rushing over to Maxx.
Blake: “Don’t tell me you buy this bullshit, Ashley!”
He countered.
Ashley: “How could you say that?! Why would anyone make up something as horrible as this?! …I can’t believe you’d suggest that after what we’ve been through…”
He sobbed, rubbing his temples. Blake sighed and bowed his head.
Blake: “Because desperate people do desperate things and I don’t fucking trust him as far as I can throw him!”
He glowered at Maxx, marching up to him and picking him up.
Blake: “Time to test that theory. I’m throwing out the trash!”
He huffed, dragging Maxx over to the door.
Maxx: “OWWH! H-HEY! HEY!”
He kicked and screamed. Ashley rushed to the door, standing in the door frame, blocking his path.
Ashley: “NO! STOP!”
He cried. Maxx sighed with relief. Blake paused to gape at Ashley.
Ashley: “We can’t kick him out! He needs our help and he needs to fix this, Blake! He needs to pay for these damages and make this right!”
He pleaded with him. Maxx gaped at Ashley. Blake drew a deep breath and dropped Maxx to the ground with a hard thud.
Maxx: “Oww! Watch da merchandise!”
He whined. Blake groaned and rubbed his temples.
Blake: “You’re right… If we let that fucker go, he will get away with this and why should WE pay for HIS damages?! We aren’t going to let that happen! He WILL pay for this and we aren’t going to let him out of our sights until he does!”
He glared at Maxx hatefully, slamming the door shut on him, enclosing him into the house with them.
Maxx: "B-But I don't got no money, A-Rad!"
He whined and groveled to his feet, trying to prod his sympathies. Blake glared at Maxx.
Ashley: “Donut worry, dude. I will help you pay for it and help you find your bandmates!”
He said firmly but gently. Blake gaped at him and Maxx grinned smugly.
Blake: “WHAT?!”
His fury soared higher.
Maxx: “You’re da BEST A-rad!”
He grinned at him and smirked at Blake who glared at him.
~
Craig called Makayla and Kurt into the garage with Veronika standing by his side. He paced around their instruments and ‘Nuklear Intoxikation’ banner hanging on the wall.
Craig: “So, we got some big news…”
He began. Makayla narrowed her eyes onto Veronika smirking beside him, not liking wherever this was going. She was up to something.
Makayla: “What, you’re having a baby?”
She deadpanned, glaring at Veronika, knowing that would piss her off. Veronika’s face twisted and contorted with rage.
Veronika: “EXCUSE ME?!”
She seethed.
Craig: “FUCK NO!”
He huffed.
Kurt: “What’s going on, Craig?”
He pressed him.
Veronika: “Spit it OUT, Craig!”
She hissed, nudging him.
Craig: “There’s gonna be some changes to Nuklear…”
He forced a smile.
Makayla: “What kind of changes?”
She challenged, looking unimpressed and glaring at Veronika.
Veronika: “Ugh, this is exactly WHY you’re not fit to be a leader, Craig!”
She huffed, shoving him aside.
Veronika: “That is why I AM the leader now!”
She grinned proudly, standing in his place. Makayla and Kurt gaped at her.
Kurt: “Are you fucking serious?! She lacks the skill!”
He glared at Craig. Makayla shot up from her seat in a fury and shoved Craig.
Makayla: “WHAT THE FUCK, CRAIG?! How could you?!”
She shrieked.
Craig: “I had to do this for the band, Makayla!”
He pleaded with her.
Makayla: “NO, you had to do this for, YOU!”
She fired back.
Makayla: “It's Andreas’ birthday today.”
She hissed at him between clenched teeth.
Craig: “O-Oh, it is?”
He shifted his eyes. Veronika glared at him.
Makayla: “You know damn well it is, I called him and HE TOLD ME WHAT YOU DID, CRAIG!”
She snapped at him. Craig drew back.
Makayla: “How could you put that onto poor Ashley?! You can’t be with Andreas and don’t want to be alone, so you turn back to HER!”
She snapped and threw her arms with frustration and pointed to Veronika. Veronika scoffed.
Veronika: “I’m not the enemy, Makayla. We’re on the same team. I paid your doughy little boyfriend for his troubles and I’m just as pissed off with Craig as you are. You know yourself he isn’t a reliable leader… and didn’t you always dream of being in a girl band?”
She challenged. Makayla paused and bowed her head.
Veronika: “I can make all your dreams come true.”
She grinned, pulling out VIP passes for ‘ThrashThrillerFest’ They all gathered around her, wide-eyed and gawking.
Veronika: “I got us on the bill for ThrashThrillerFest! We’re going on tour!”
She grinned.
Craig: “H-HOLY SHIT! YOU ACTUALLY DID IT!”
He gasped.
Veronika: “Of course I did! I NEVER break my promises.”
She declared, handing them each a pass.
Makayla: “A-are these real?!”
She gaped at them with skepticism.
Veronika: “Of course they are! You know who my father is, right?!”
She scoffed.
Kurt: “Thank you, Veronika. Maybe you are a better leader.”
He said earnestly. Craig bowed his head and Veronika grinned.
Veronika: “Gather all your shit, we’re moving our rehearsals to my place where you’ll have a proper studio and everything!”
She beamed. Makayla glanced down at her ThrashThrillerFest VIP pass, feeling conflicted.
~
Later that day, they all rode together in Kurt’s van with all their instruments in the back.
Veronika: “Make a stop here, Kurt! My shout!”
She grinned and pointed at Voyage Burger, laughing at Larry standing out the front in the Burger Berserker costume.
Makaya: “We’re banned from Voyage Burger…”
She sighed.
Veronika: “So what?! We’ll just go through the drive-thru. No one will know or care.”
She scoffed. They pulled into the parking lot, driving past Larry. Veronika stuck her head out the window, smacking his Burger Berserker head off of him as they cruised past him.
Lord Kradula: “HEY!”
He huffed, chasing after his head. Craig cackled with amusement.
Veronika: “Hey Dorkula, my band is moving into the studio now! It’s OURS now, so get your shit outta there!”
She grinned at him. Lord Kradula gaped at her.
Lord Kradula: “WHAT?!”
He glared at them.
Lord Kradula: “Oh, I see how it is. You signed your soul over to the devil.”
He scoffed at Craig and glared at him. Craig’s laughter died on his lips.
Lord Kradula: “Enjoy your new hell, assholes.”
He huffed and stormed off. Makayla pursed her lips and looked pensive.
They rolled into the drive-thru and the speaker box rustled with a familiar shrill voice.
Voice: “OWWH! Greetings, rebel rockers! Tonight we have a special guest: MAXXY MALONE OF SEX BEEST!”
They all gaped at each other.
Kurt: “...You gotta be shittin’ me.”
He growled and sneered.
Makayla: “Oh no…”
She twisted her mouth.
Craig: “WAHAHAHA, HOLY SHIT! We’re in for a treat!”
She cackled wickedly
Veronika: “Oh, this is going to be good.”
She smirked and Kurt drove forward to the next window.
They all burst out laughing when they saw Maxx operating the drive-thru dressed in an awkward combination of the Voyage Burger uniform and his usual neon attire. He wore the Vermillion red Voyage Burger tunic over his pink mesh shirt and leopard print pants with a horned helmet on his head with “Sex Beest” crudely scrawled on it. His name tag read ‘Climb-Maxx’ on it.
Maxx: “...Ohhh, NAH-AH! Get lost, assholes! I DON’T WORK HERE, I’M JUST DOING A BIT FOR DA FANS, GOSH!”
He hissed and stamped his feet.
Craig: “Hey, SEX BEES, get me the spicy Valhalla chicken burger and some Odin rings!”
He laughed at him, flicking his horned helmet.
Maxx: “FUCK OFF, ASSHOLES!”
The Viking boss came marching in.
Viking Boss: “HEY! What’s going on here?!”
Maxx: “It's not my fault! They’re being assholes!”
He whined. The Viking boss turned to the van and his anger shifted to them.
Viking Boss: “YOU! I BANNED YOU LOT! Get OUT of here!”
He barked at them. Veronika cackled.
Viking Boss: “Veronika Wood? Your father would be disappointed in you hanging around these hooligans.”
He clicked his tongue and shook his head. Makayla frowned.
Makayla: “Oh, but, she’s the leader of the gang.”
She corrected him, bitterly. Veronika cackled like a witch and grinned at him. She then turned to Maxx.
Veronika: “Bye, loser!”
They all cackled as they drove off. The Viking boss shook his head.
Viking Boss: “Never use naughty words on the job. Go clean up the restrooms!”
He commanded, handing him a mop.
Maxx stomped back into the restaurant with the mop, seething. His fury soared when he saw Ashley and Blake sitting at a booth together. He marched up to Ashley, placing his hand on his shoulder.
Maxx: “DA FUCK, A-Rad?! You said you would help me!”
He shrieked, slamming the mop down onto the floor.
Ashley: “I did! I helped you get the job! I’m so proud of you! I’m impressed.”
He beamed, clapping his hands.
Blake: “I’m impressed, too. You didn’t shower and wore your clown clothes to the job interview and yet you still managed to get the job. Bravo.”
He deadpanned. Maxx glared at him.
Maxx: “Hmph it's not fair! Why do I gotta work but A-rad doesn’t!”
He pouted, folding his arms over his chest. Ashley bowed his head.
Blake: “You’re right, it isn’t fair. Ashley should be getting paid to be your maid, chef, chauffeur, and butler service.”
He huffed bitterly. Ashley bowed his head.
Blake: “Surely your parents paid for those services back at home.”
He narrowed his eyes into slits at him. Maxx gaped at him.
Yvette skipped over to them, carrying their food over to them.
Yvette: “Hey, Ashley! Here’s your odin rings and Destrukto meal!”
She greeted him with a smile.
Ashley: “Hey, Yvette! Thanks for talking to your boss for Maxxy!”
He beamed and took a bite out of his burger. Maxx pouted.
Yvette: “Of course, anything for you.”
She flashed him a smile. Maxx pouted.
Maxx: “What about Maxxy, baby?!”
He whined. Yvette read his name tag.
Yvette: “Oh, yes, go clean the restrooms… Climb-Maxx.”
She then froze when she realized what his name sounded like read out loud.
Maxx: “Ohoho, care to join me in a climb-Maxx, baby?”
He winked at her.
Yvette: “No!”
She groused at him and scurried off. Blake and Ashley gaped at Maxx.
Ashley: “Dude! You can't say stuff like that!”
He gasped.
Blake: “Climb-Maxx?! Is all that fake tan seeping into your brain or something?!
He rolled his eyes at Maxx.
Maxx: “Nah-ah! You're jealous of my genius! It's a play on Climb-maxing, but I put Maxxy's name in it!”
He grinned proudly.
Blake: “...You mean climaxing.”
He rubbed his temples.
Maxx: ‘Yeah, dats what I said! Climb-maxing! Clearly you dunno know what that is! It's when your horniness climbs up to da maximum and you max your cum all over da place! That's why it's called a climb-max! Duh!”
He pouted. Ashley gaped at Maxx. Blake held his hands up, dropping his fork, defeated.
Blake: “There goes my appetite. I'm not having this conversation in the middle of a diner. I don't want to have this conversation at all.”
He shook his head, waving his hands.
Lord Kradula came in dressed in his Burger Berserker costume. He narrowed his glare onto Maxx when he saw him with the uniform slapped onto him.
Lord Kradula: “What the hell are you doing here?”
He sneered at him.
Maxx: “I’m doin’ a bit for da fans! They wanted me to come down for a meet ‘n greet!”
He said smugly.
Lord Kradula: “Pfft, what fans?”
He looked around and scoffed. Blake rolled his eyes.
Ashley: “Why are you lying, Maxxy? You work here now because you flushed my food down the toilet and now you need to pay off the water damage to our house!”
He corrected him with an undertone of hurt. Maxx turned to Ashley with a glare. Lord Kradula scoffed and laughed at Maxx.
Lord Kradula: “Just when I thought you were stupid. You prove to me you’re even stupider than I thought. Glam metal is for stupid people, after all.”
He laughed at Maxx.
Maxx: “NAH-AH! At least I’m not a vampire! Vampires SUCK!”
He pouted, shoving him. Lord Kradula staggered back and glared at him.
Lord Kradula: “I am NOT a vampire, you idiot! I’m TRVE KVLT BLACK METAL!”
He rasped, charging at him with his plastic axe.
The entire diner turned their attention to the man in the Burger Berserker costume fighting the clownish Viking employee. People gathered around them, laughing and cheering. They chanted “Fight!” “Fight” “Fight” Ashley and Blake watched the chaos unfold. Ashley cupped his mouth and rushed in between them.
Ashley: “O-oh no! Stop fighting! How about we talk about this over some odin rings and make peace, huh?”
He pleaded with them, presenting them with a basket of Odin Rings. Lord Kradula smacked them out of his hands.
Lord Kradula: “Shut up, hippie!”
He hissed, shoving him out of the way. Blake grabbed Ashley’s arm, pulling him away from them.
Blake: “Stay out of this, Ash!”
He hissed firmly, gripping his arm tightly.
Blake: “Let them moo and shit in each other’s pastures. Don’t get dragged into this.”
He nodded and watched Maxx and Lord Kradula as they picked up food off tables and threw it at each other.
Maxx: “NAH-AH! YOU SUCK COS YOU’RE A VAMPIRE!”
He rasped, throwing a hamburger at him. It bounced off his enormous Burger Berserker head and onto the floor. Lord Kradula seethed at him and shoved him to the ground. The crowd grew larger and louder, chanting at them to fight.
Suddenly, a loud horn cut in, and the diner fell silent and turned their attention to the noise. They turned to see the Viking Boss standing with a massive horn with Yvette standing beside him, pointing at Maxx and Lord Kradula.
Viking Boss: “HEY! Break it up, YOU TWO!”
He rasped, clapping his hands together.
Viking Boss: “Everyone back to their meals! This is a FAMILY diner, not a wrestling ring!”
He waved his arms around and huffed. He shifted his gaze down at Maxx.
Viking Boss: “YOU. You’re FIRED. Get OUT of here!”
He snapped.
Maxx: “What did I do?!”
He pouted. The Boss gaped at him and laughed a hollow laugh.
Viking Boss: “It's only your first day and you have only been working here for TWO hours and you already broke several rules!”
He began.
Viking Boss: “You got into a fight with your co-worker, here!”
He gestured to Lord Kradula beside him, fixing his Burger Berserker helmet and glaring at Maxx.
Viking Boss: “You were inappropriate with your other co-worker here.”
He gestured to Yvette. Yvette glared at Maxx.
Viking Boss: “I had complaints about THIS being put inside people’s meals!”
His temper rose as he held up Maxx’s glamour shot photos signed by him. Maxx grinned smugly. Blake slapped his forehead.
Viking Boss: “You’re not wearing the uniform correctly either, Climb-Maxx!”
He shook his head at Maxx’s mesh pink top and read his name tag. Maxx stumbled over a laugh and the restaurant laughed. The Viking Boss went red in the face when it finally dawned on him. He then fixed his gaze to Maxx and his fury soared.
Viking Boss: “YOU’RE FIRED AND BANNED FROM VOYAGE BURGER! GET OUT!”
He shouted in his face.
Maxx: “Finally.”
He shrugged nonchalantly and headed for the door. He then turned around to the crowd.
Maxx: “OWWWWH! Rock on rebel rockers! Maxxy Malone of Sex Beest has left da buildin’!”
He pumped his fists in the air and left. The diner burst into laughter with others shooting him dirty looks. Ashley and Blake's jaws hung wide open.
~
Maxx burst out of the diner and headed to the car as Ashley and Blake followed after him.
Blake: “What the fuck was THAT?!”
He glared at Maxx.
Maxx: “What? I’m a rebel rocker?”
He said loftily.
Ashley: “I can’t believe you got fired from Voyage Burger on your first day…”
He sighed and knit his eyebrows.
Blake: “I can believe it.”
He rolled his eyes at Maxx.
Maxx: “It's not my fault! It's dat Vampire asshole!”
He pouted.
Blake: “Well, if you got fired from the only place that would hire you, I don’t know what hope you have, guess you have no hope.”
He shook his head and threw his arms up.
Maxx: “Maybe working a job just isn’t for me!”
He said loftily and shrugged. Blake glared at him.
Ashley: “Aw, don’t be hard on yourself, dude! You’ll find the right job for you!”
He assured him, patting his back.
Ashley: “OH! I know! You could join the circus!”
He beamed. Blake burst out laughing.
Blake: “Haha, nice one, Ash.”
He smirked.
Maxx: “W-wha?! SHUT UP, A- RAD! Don’t be a fat dick!”
He huffed, throwing an empty can of coke at him. Ashley flinched and laughed awkwardly.
A deep woman’s voice cut in, clearing her throat, they all turned around to see a suspicious-looking old lady with a tall, muscular build.
Old Lady: “Psst. “I heard you were looking to make some money, young man. I got the perfect job for you right here!”
She smirked, handing Maxx a job advertisement for a “sexy rockstar stud” to entertain at a “bikini-babe party” Maxx’s eyes lit up with a wide grin. Blake and Ashley gaped.
Maxx: “OWWWH, rock on! Maxxy got da job! In your face doom ‘n gloom!"
He gloated in Blake’s face. Blake gaped at him.
Ashley: “Oh wow dude… what are the odds?!”
He beamed.
Ashley: “ …Hey? Where did she go?”
He looked around for the old lady, but she was gone. Blake rolled his eyes at Maxx.
Blake: “Right. Not suspicious at all.”
~
The next day, Ashley and Maxx pulled up at a big house with balloons hanging over the fence. Maxx grinned as he rolled out of the car, dressed in a neon blue vest with pink leopard print spandex pants and neon green cowboy boots.
Ashley: "Uhhh, are you sure this is the right address?"
He scratched his head at the colorful decorations. A woman in her forties with a blond bob cut approached the boys at the gate.
Woman: "Hello, are you... Maxi Malone?"
She arched an eyebrow as she read off a clipboard.
Maxx: "That’s right, I'm Maxxy, baby!"
Woman: "Great, right this way! They're so excited to see you!"
She smiled, leading them into the property.
Maxx: "Ohoho, I bet they are!"
Ashley: "Uhh, Maxx…"
He tugged at Maxx's shirt as he observed the bright and colourful decorations of clowns and balloons.
Maxx: "Not now, A-rad!"
He waved his hand, marching into the backyard, where he was greeted by a dozen children cheering as soon as they saw him.
Little Boy: "THE CLOWN IS HERE!"
Little Girl: "YAY! FUNNY!"
The excited children screamed and cheered surrounding Maxx, poking and prodding him with their toys.
Maxx: "OH NO! W-WHA?! WHAT IS THIS?! NAH-AH, I'M NOT A CLOWN! OWW! OWW!"
Ashley cupped his mouth and burst out laughing.
Maxx: "A-rad help me!"
He whined, rolling around on the lawn.
Ashley: “Oh, right, hehe!”
He picked up a pie and threw it at Maxx. The children broke into a chorus of laughter.
Maxx: “NOOO! A-RAD NOT LIKE THAT!”
He shrieked and went to throw a pie at Ashley, but it splattered all over his cowboy boots.
Maxx: “NOOO! MY REBEL ROCKER BOOTS!”
He shrieked. The children laughed so hard, they couldn’t contain themselves.
~
An hour later, the blonde woman approached Maxx with an envelope.
Woman: “Oh, the children had so much fun, you’re the best clown we’ve ever had, thank you so much, here’s your payment!”
Maxx: “I’m not a clown!”
The woman laughed, thinking he was joking. Ashley turned to Maxx and patted his back.
Ashley: “Hey, dude, don’t be down, you make for a totally awesome clown and you made those kids' day! You should be proud!”
Maxx: “B-but I’m a rockstar, not a clown, A-rad!”
He pouted as they made their way back out onto the street.
An hour later, the blonde woman approached Maxx with an envelope.
Woman: “Oh, the children had so much fun, you’re the best clown we’ve ever had, thank you so much, here’s your payment!”
Maxx: “I’m not a clown!”
The woman laughed, thinking he was joking. Ashley turned to Maxx and patted his back.
Ashley: “Hey, dude, don’t be down, you make for a totally awesome clown and you made those kids' day! You should be proud!”
Maxx: “B-but I’m a rockstar, not a clown, A-rad!”
He pouted as they made their way back out onto the street.
As they stepped out onto the street, Craig swooped in like an eagle hungry for its prey, grabbing the envelope out of Maxx’s hand. Veronika, Kurt, and Makayla stood beside him, surrounding Maxx and Ashley.
Craig: “We’ll be takin’ that.”
He grinned. Ashley froze when he saw them. Maxx shrieked.
Maxx: “HEY! NAH-AH! That’s MINE, ASSHOLE!”
Makayla: “Hey, Ashley!”
Ashley: “M-Makayla?! Hey dude, give it back! That’s his money!”
He cried and knit his eyebrows. Craig held the envelope up high in his arm so neither of them could reach it. He had a good few inches over both of them. Veronika cackled with amusement.
Veronika: “Nah, actually, it’s ours. Consider us your debt collectors! Who’d you think set up this gig anyway?!”
Ashley: “Y-you were the old lady?!”
Maxx: “YOU! You assholes set this up n’ made me look like a fool!”
Makayla: “No, Maxx, you made yourself look like a fool, but that’s what you were getting paid for.”
She chuckled at Maxx. Ashley swallowed hard.
Craig: “Toodles, Maxi-pads!”
He chuckled and shoved past him, walking towards his Jeep with Veronika and Makayla.
Ashley: “WAIT! W-why did you do this and why does he owe you guys?!”
He called out beseechingly. Makayla sighed.
Craig: “He fuckin’ stole our debt leverage, so we collected his debt!"
Ashley: “...Debt leverage?!”
He eyed them all incredulously, including Maxx.
Makayla: “That stupid portrait.”
Maxx: “HEY! It’s NOT stupid! It’s SEXY!”
Ashley knit his eyebrows and looked baffled.
Ashley: “...But, that’s his portrait!”
Craig and Veronika cackled with amusement and got in the car.
Makayla: “...You don’t understand, Ashley.”
She sighed and bowed her head, turning around and climbing into the car with them. Ashley watched them drive around the corner.
Ashley: “...What don’t I understand?”
He cried, shifting his eyes over to Maxx.
TO BE CONTINUED.
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